In a shocking turn of events this afternoon, every single Milford public school pupil has dropped out of school!
Evidence suggests the children, who were just denied the opportunity to watch President Obama's "Back To School" speech (including a stay-in-school message) by Milford's Superintendent of Schools Harvey B. Polansky, didn't understand that they should stay in school rather than quit.
As a result, every single Milford child has now dropped out, and they are currently roaming the streets causing a noisy ruckus.
* * * UPDATE: Apparently my information was somewhat incorrect. Milford students haven't dropped out...yet!
We apologize for the error.
But really, was it absolutely necessary to politicize a talk from the President just because you don't agree with his politics? Has the partisan divide the conservatives are so feverishly working for finally reached this level? It's really getting silly.